


The End

by mijimena



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Gen, Post-Series, so much angst it is unreal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-12
Updated: 2015-04-12
Packaged: 2018-03-22 12:01:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3728158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mijimena/pseuds/mijimena
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Eren wins wars, talks to dead people, and realizes things have changed while he wasn't looking. Sometimes, victory is not as sweet as you try to believe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The End

**Author's Note:**

> product of a horrible terrible no good headcanon found on tumblr dot com

4.

It began at the end, when his sister pulled him out of the titan's disintegrating body, sobbing in large gasps.

"It's over, Eren, it's finally over." - and then there was Armin too- "They're… gone.  _Eren, you did it_. Every last one of them is  _gone_."

Scalding steam hissed around them in large billows, and remains of titan sinew tugged at his cheeks. Mikasa's scarf trailed across his face, mingling with the iron tang of blood like a red hot reminder. And as Eren was held in his best friends' tearful embrace, he felt strangely numb.

Later he realized this was because they had all overlooked one terrible, obvious fact. But that came much later (too late).

 

3.

At least now he could visit that tiny chapel in Trost District without any lingering sense of shame.

"Hey, Captain Levi." He said quietly, standing in front of a row of stone markers, some old, some heartrendingly new. Levi's was one of the former, and he wondered if the old man regretted not seeing the battle until its end.

He drew his blades one last time and, after collecting his thoughts a moment, laid them down softly in the three-year old grass growing around the plot.

"Well, we did it. The titans are all gone. Humanity won. It's over." He paused, rather unsure of what to do with himself.

"I was going to say I wish you could've been there with us, but that's just selfish. You got out of here before things got too bad, believe it or not. I hope you're happy though, wherever you are, old man. I hope we made you proud."

He felt acutely the sentimental nature of his words and could almost see Levi sitting on his own gravestone, one leg swung nonchalantly over his knee, drawing out Eren's name in long syllables. "Fuck it, Jaeger. Don't give me that sappy drivel. You brats carried it all the way through, I'll give you that. Oi, why the  _hell_  are you crying, soldier?"

He hadn't even realized the tears were streaming uncontrollably from his eyes and almost had to laugh at his (imaginary) captain's alarmed tone.

Levi scoffed, brushing some tiny speck of dirt from his boots. "Wasting tears on someone like me. Thought you were better than that. Hey, at least now you can go celebrate in the capital, get with some pretty girls, have the queen decorate you with medals until you can't stand… although technically not  _all_  the titans are gone, now are they? How many of those damned shifters are still running around?"

"Only me," he replied softly, remembering a flash of blonde hair matted with blood and Bertholdt's anguished, almost thankful expression right before Eren had shot him in the face. "And Annie, but she's still crystallized and locked in some basement at headquarters."  _But what does it matter, Captain Levi, what does it all matter?_

Levi remained silent, waiting until the young man ran out of tears and slowly began walking away. Then he bent over lazily, picking the pair of blades up and hefting them in his hand, thinking that Eren must be regretful he'd used them far too rarely.

"You know I've always been proud, brat."

But of course the cemetery was completely empty, and no one was around to grasp those words hanging in the air.

 

2.

Later, he did celebrate with the Survey Corps at lavish parties in the capital. He woke up in other girls' beds to pounding headaches and Mikasa's wrath. He even had a ceremonial uniform tailored so Queen Historia could present to him nearly every royal award available. But it was too much and never enough at the same time, and he drifted through the mansions and taverns all with the same blurred mindset.

Levi's (his own) words resonated constantly in his head. Reiner, Bert, Ymir, Annie.

He thought he had gotten over them long ago. Soldiers, traitors, titans, friends. There was that old ache of rage, but it was tempered by the memory of easy laughter, easy brotherhood, and calm eyes even when looking down the barrel of a gun. Their existence was wrong, completely wrong since the beginning, and Eren couldn't forget Bert's fucking  _peaceful_ smile before he had his face blown off. Still he felt that wrongness, and all he wanted was just a bit of peace.

 

1.

Now that titan research was no longer necessary, Commander Zoe channeled her zealous energy into building up the government under Historia, reorganizing the military, and setting the new rules for their entire world.

But every so often, Hanji would eye him with that familiar gleam in her eye, and he realized the fatal flaw in their logic. There was one last thing he had to do. He had to make everything alright.

 

0.

"Eren," Mikasa rapped sharply on the door, "Eren, what are you doing in there? Everyone's waiting for you up at the palace."

"Are you okay, Eren?" Armin called, rattling the doorknob. "It's a really quick ceremony, you don't even have to give a speech or anything."

"Eren, why is the door locked? What are you doing?" Mikasa apparently already sensed something was off.

Eren had to quirk his lips a little at this. Count on his sister to act all concerned. As if they were still kids running in the streets of Shiganshina.

"Eren-"

But they weren't kids anymore, now were they? He tilted his head, looking intently into a mirror mounted on the wall. He never thought anything of it before, but he hated the man who stared back out of it.

"Eren, what are-"

"Do you remember?" Eren interrupted, and his two friends outside the room paused a beat.

"Remember what, Eren?" Ah, there was Armin, typical Armin with his cautious words and controlled demeanor.

"What you said… after the last battle. About all the titans being gone."

By now, Mikasa was banging on the door with increasing urgency as Armin tried to talk his friend out of whatever daze he was in.

"Yes, I remember Eren. What of it?"

"Well, Armin, you were wrong." He picked up a small revolver lying on the beside table, newly cleaned and loaded. "Hey guys, do you remember what I say when we were just kids in the Trainee Corps? Remember? I was going to kill all of the titans."

"Yes, Eren, we remember.  _Now let us in._ " Mikasa's voice was shrill.

"I still need to." Eren's finger was on gun, lightly, softly. It was the right time to be gentle, for once.

"What the hell are you saying, Eren?! You already-"

"I still need to kill… Every last one of them." Eren murmured, then brought the revolver up to the side of his head and pulled the trigger.

 

* * *

 

_And in the end,_

_the love you take_

_is equal to the love you make._


End file.
